25th September2005 (I Just Want You To Know...)

wow... wat an end to a very very eventful month... well in my case it was eventful... it was like being enlightened several times... or to put in a less dignified way, it was like i was piss drunk and high 24/7... let me see... i've been on a buzz everyday, working my ass off as if theres no tomorrow... i've been doin other people's work for a fee of course... i've had to readjust my attitude and way of thinking to the point of cracking my head into a few pieces n rearranging them... i've gotten my driving license which was so overdue... some people have now treated me in a different way... i've been called up by someone who's mobile no. is almost similar to mine... i've gotten a new cut which i have not had for a very long time... i've now know what i want out of life.... and i guess thats it....

hav u ever tried to forget about someone but cant seem to do it?? its like a invisible block inside your brain that u cant seem to throw out... u keep on thinking bout that person all the time... their smile... their face.. their personality... everything about them.... u might call it missing them... u might call it still hung up on them.... u know that no matter how hard u want to be with that person, it just cant happen... there's no link, no connection, no synergy.... ur brain tells u that u must let go n move on... but ur heart doesnt wanna.... sigh.... 4 people who say that its easy to forget bout them, they must be freakin heartless... everytime that person pasts through my mind, all those emotions that i felt for them comes rushing back... all the love, hate anger, jealousy... i guess the backstreet boys new song is a true thing... no matter how hurt or angry u become after a relationship, when u think about it, it was well worth it... and the funny thing is, u'd wish u could go back in time n do it again... there is nothing in this world that can compare to sweet memories... nothing.... well peeps i guess thats it for now... got class in a few minutes... adios amigos....

3rd September 2005 (Wake me up when september..... starts!!)

yes!!!! i hav done it!!!!! i have changed!!!!! well... i changed a bit.. i finally fixed up my handwritting a bit.. yes its not squigly or unreadable anymore.. if i can help it.. hehehe!!!! my focus has been solid for da past weeks.. focused on work, getting the work done, checkin if there's more n still givin room for a social life.. for now i feel great!!! i wanna get up n show da world wat i can do... i've also changed my personality a bit.. i kno some of u out there might object to this with reasons like "dats not being yourself" or "your not honest with yourself" or some other but i believe the changes i'm doing is for da better.. really i do... but if da changes somehow ends up making me the biggest jerk in da world, i'll admit defeat n return to my evil ways.. hehehhe!!! well the alterations arent really that drastic.. i've decided to open up my mind to new ideas, new approaches n new possibilities.. lets just say i've reached a new level of enlightenment for myself... call it a second awakening.. well peeps i've gotta run for now cause i'm using a comp in an office somewhere in uni (cant really tell u where for the sake of da doubt)... adios!!!!